HUMOR ARTICLES
Comeback of the Mustache? I Don't Think So
Auria Cortes
There is an ugly rumor circulating about the return of the 1970s mustache-wearing male finding his way to the 21st century. Is this a backlash to the metrosexual era? Is this a way for the "regular guy" to reclaim his masculinity? Is this a way of making food stuck to a man's face acceptable? As...
Viral Video Quickly Becoming Its Own Genre
John Heritage
What works as viral video? What type of video are you, as the viewer, going to want to forward to all your friends, and they, in turn, will want to forward to all their friends, and so on until the “virus” effect of the video has spread to millions? There are no definite, key examples of what...
Democrats Urge George Bush To Run For Third Term
Tom Attea
Congressional Democrats, delighted with George Bush’s stubborn resistance to their every request, have invited him to run for a third term. Forgoing support for their own roster of Democratic candidates, they have offered to vote for an exception to the 2-term limit. Senator Harry Reid, outspoken...
A Treasure Chest for People Who Love Funny Clothing
Michael D’Elena
I have always been a big fan of funny clothing. I am always on the look out for all types of funny clothing, especially when I am out of town. You see, funny t-shirt are the thing in our city and practically everybody has one. Well this has become a disadvantage, at least in my own point of view....
Cheryl Crow Touches Carl Rove; Arm Falls Off
Tom Attea
During a White House Correspondents Dinner, Cheryl Crow, who, with Laurie David, is doing a Stop Global Warming College Tour, went up to Carl Rove, hoping to discuss the environmental issue with him. Carl didn't seem overly pleased with the subject matter. Unaware of just how toxic...
Prehistoric Camel Found At Wal-Mart Dig
Tom Attea
Sure, Wal-Mart carries a big inventory, but how about a prehistoric camel? A nursery owner in Arizona was digging away with the simple goal of planting a new tree at the site of a future Wal-Mart, when he poked into the bones of an ancient camel. He informed the curator of the geology...
George Bush’s Secrets to Better Golf
Karen Fish
Cheat. Lie. Intimidate. These are the true fundamentals of golf. If George W. Bush shoots a 7 on the par 5 9th hole and his playing partner Rex W. Tillerson the CEO of Exxon Mobil asks the President of the United States of America what he shot, George W. Bush says “Put me down for a 5.” George...
Pardon Me, But I Thought Free, Freebie, No Cost, Free Download As Well As Many Others, Meant Just That!
Theresa Twogood
You all know what I am referring to and I'm sure you are as fed up as I am with all the parsing of common words to misrepresent something, someone or both. The parsing of commonly held words is stupid and will not be tolerated by the masses any longer! If an advertiser wants us to dance a jig or...
Female Muslim Sexologist On TV; Proves More Popular Than Al-Qaeda
Tom Attea
A female Muslim sexologist named Heba Kotb now has a TV program called “Big Talk,” where the courageous pioneer discusses sex in as normal and healthy a manner as she can dare to in her excitable part of the world. A conservative Muslim herself, the irrepressible Egyptian lady actually has...
Washington Madam Names Clients; Who’s Next?
Tom Attea
As if our fearless leaders in Washington don’t have enough to fret about, now Deborah Jeane Palfrey, a madam accused of running a prostitution business has, as part of her defense, vowed to make her list of clients public. Worse yet, she has begun to do so. First on the roster was the high-ranking ...
Idiotic Human Behavior Traced To Greenhouse Gases
Tom Attea
An innovative study by an environmental scientist attempts to explain the recent uptick in idiotic human behavior. According to the resourceful researcher, the likely culpret is the abundant supply of greenhouse gases. As a result of their ascendance, there is simply not enough oxygen left in the...
Netflix Informed About Movies On Demand; May Stop Mailing DVDs
Tom Attea
Netflix, the company whose enormous red billboards have been annoying computer users for some time, has been informed about the existence of on-demand movies. Shocked that a person can simply click a remote control to pay for and view a movie, the company has realized that expecting consumers...
Scientists Discover Earthlike Planet; Hope The Civilization Is More Advanced
Tom Attea
European astronomers, upon discovering an Earthlike planet outside of our own solar system, winningly named Gliese 581c, were immediately fearful that the sort of behavior that goes on here might be more widespread than previously believed and could only hope that the civilization is more advanced....
Suicide Bomber Arrives At Entrance To Paradise At Same Time As Victims
Tom Attea
“What are they doing here?” the suicide bomber asked Allah, pointing to the fifty-two victims he had just blown up along with himself. “I thought I was going to Paradise alone.” “Don’t let him in!” a dead man called from among the recent arrivals. “He killed us!” a female victim shouted....
Al-Sadr And Ahmadinejad Hope Nobody Notices Their Clever Teamwork
Tom Attea
One week the inflammatory anti-American Iraqi cleric Mugtada Al-Sadr criticizes George Bush for not withdrawing American troops from Iraq, so, he apparently hopes, the Democratic government will collapse and he can rush in to govern like his fellow mullahs in Iran. The next week the feisty...
The Awesome 80's
Matthew W. Grant
It was the decade of decadence. It was about glitz and glamour as well as baubles, bangles, and beads. Everyone loved Luke and Laura in the afternoon. Lady Diane became the People's Princess when she married Prince Charles. Nighttime soaps like Dallas and Dynasty ruled the airwaves. President...